How I Decided Where to Get Married

I never really had big visions of my wedding as a little girl (or a not so little girl for that matter).    So when it came time to actually having to think about it and quickly move into decision mode (due to my amazing success at procrastination), I had a lot of catching up to do.  

I am also not what I would call a traditional bride, so holding a large wedding in my hometown or anything like that is not me and was not going to happen.   I do not expect anyone to understand that, just to trust that there are certain things in life that are important to me and this is not one of them.

My rapidly changing visions had me walking down the aisle somewhere a little more my style.

Put it this way, when I was in Italy, I had picked out venues in Rome, Tuscany and along the coast.   I spent my mornings drinking coffee and dreaming of my grand, and yet intimate, Italian wedding.   It would be very me, a little modern, a little traditional, very italian (ok, so I'm not actually italian), a little regal and a lot small.  If I had one inkling of a vision when I was younger, it would have to be this.   I even picked out my italian designer dress (which truth be told looks nothing like what I eventually picked, but I was SO in love with it at the time).

And then I went to Paris.   Where I spent my afternoons drinking tea with lots of milk and cute little brown sugar cubes, dreaming of a romantic Parisian wedding, filled with lace and gold and lots of pink.   My little French Fairy Tale.

And then, well,  I came home and reality sort of sunk in.   Visions of sugar plum fairies dancing in my head were replaced with the stark reality that I had only a couple of months to plan this little fairy tale of mine, and realistically, running away to Europe probably wasn't in the cards.   Sigh.  Sigh again.    It was a sad time.

I threw myself wholeheartedly into internet research.    We had a permanent date for quite some time.    Over the course of several weeks, we traveled to California, Maine, Nantucket, South Carolina, Arizona finally ending up with a swing through the North Carolina coast.   I could do that.   Water is good.   Close to home, but not too close.   Done.   For about a week we were getting married at the coast.    Beach houses were scrutinized, finalists prepared for site visits.  I envisioned our families bonding on the sand under large umbrellas, taking naps in the afternoon and grilling fun beach food in the evenings.     I even considered (briefly) going barefoot.

Another reality check when I really started thinking about everyone staying together under one roof for a week.   Good in theory.   Not so sure it would be great in practice, especially given my stress level during situations like that.    Back to the drawing board.

That's when it hit me.   Fall Wedding.   Why not the mountains?   Asheville?    The Biltmore?   Where John and I had our very first weekend getaway.   Perfect.

From this point on, it was actually quite easy.   We were visiting the Biltmore the following weekend, touring the various sites.   We saw the Butterfly Garden and Conservatory and looked at each other and knew we were done.    It was like the vision I never quite had.    

(Here's a few teasers...)

And that is "How I Decided Where to Get Married".    It took me awhile, but I think we ended up at the right spot, for us.     And now... the real fun begins...

I would love to hear your stories!   How did you pick your wedding location?   Was it like love at first site or something a little more practical?  

Venue Meeting & Table Mock-ups

We went out to the venue for a meeting today.  This is J's last visit out there before he leaves for training and this will be the first time either of my coordinator's saw the venue.  It was definitely have an interesting meeting, some good, some bad.  Be forewarned, there will probably be a little venting in this post.

I was very excited that when we walked into the venue, it was actually set up for an event.  That was the first time I've ever seen it set up and it looked really nice.  It definitely helps put things in perspective.

We then sat down with our site coordinator and went over some questions and money issues that we were having.  We originally thought that we would be able to fit 10 people at a 60 inch round, but with the chairs they provide, only 8 will fit comfortable at a table.  So that means we're probably going to need more tables than we originally had planned on.  Our site coordinator also mentioned a while back that she could get us all the 60 inch rounds that we needed, but now she's saying that if we need more than 10 we're going to have to rent the extras from a rental company.  That's going to be an extra hassle that we had no have planned on.

We also decided that we have no reason to use the kitchen at the venue, so we're going to have our site coordinator lock it up.  It costs $100 extra to use the kitchen, so that will definitely save us some money.  They don't have an industrial kitchen anyways, so there's not really much our caterers would be able to do in there.  So, we still have about $400 left to pay to the venue, which includes set-up and clean-up fees, as well as the tables.

While were at the venue, we did some table mock-ups so that I could see how everything would look.  Here's what we came up with:

There will be actual candles in the tealights surrounding the centerpieces so there will be a nice flicker there and then I'll probably put more rose petals around the centerpieces too.  I'm worried the tables might be too plain, but I'm not sure what else I'd put on there...

We also did a mock-up of the sweetheart table.  We tried it with both pink and green tablecloths and I think we decided to go with the pink so it will stand out from the rest of the green tables.

Our coordinators also discussed some different catering options with us that we're going to entertain.  One of my coordinators works at a restaurant who wants to branch into the wedding business, so they're going to give us a great deal on food.  She said we could get a salad course, 3 entrees, and 3 side dishes for about $8 a head.  She also said she could probably find us a bartender for a really good price.  So, I emailed them earlier to discuss that and we're going to try to arrange a tasting.

So, all in all it was a good meeting and we got a lot accomplished.  What do you think of the table mock-ups?

Reception Venue Layout

I figured that it would make my life easier if I did a layout for our reception hall.  I have to give the site coordinator a layout of how I want the tables and I have a bunch of people helping set up, so I figured I'd streamline it into one layout for everyone.

I think I have everything included in this.  We're going to have a total of 11 guest tables and we could probably squeeze a couple more in if necessary.  Do you see anything I may be missing?

Edited with answers to everyone's questions:
JIM: Is the Buffet table/line going to be seen from the sweetheart table?
It shouldn't be.  It was really hard to actually draw the reception hall because it's not a perfect rectangle.  The buffet area is kind of set back from the rest of the reception hall behind the fireplace.  I'm probably going to put some kind of greenery at the beginning of the buffet tables though so that you won't see the food in every picture.

Karen: Make the gift table and guest book table the same thing.
There is actually an entrance way to the reception area that is connected to the banquet hall, but it's behind like 3 walls.  The guest book table and the gift table are both attached in that entry way.  So we want to make the most use out of the tables we have.

Karen: Also, just check with your caterer: will two 8-foot tables be enough for the buffet?
I will definitely check with my caterer, but these are the tables the venue using for every wedding, so I'm assuming it will be enough.

Karen: And do they want the bar set up like that? We do one table in front of the bartender and one behind him.
It's actually a built in bar, not tables.  Like I mentioned before, really hard to draw our reception site.

Karen: Escort cards or seating chart?
I'm going to be doing a seating chart, but I think I'm just going to prop it up on the guest book table.  Haven't actually finalized this detail yet, but it's something I need to do on our next visit.

Karen: And I assume there's no slideshow? You'd need a separate table for the projector.
Nope, not doing a slideshow.


Karen: If you're using floor-length linens, you need to indicate the table sizes here, too, so whoever is ordering your linens gets exactly the right sizes.
I bought the linens myself so I don't have to worry about that.  

Genevieve: Is the dance floor in the middle?
Yup, we're just leaving the area in the middle open for dancing after dinner.

Genevieve: Will the tables by the DJ move after the dinner?
No, we will not be moving those tables.  This area is kind of an alcove so there's plenty of room for the dance floor.  I'm worried about the noise from the DJ though, so I'm going to have to think that through a little more.

Anna: Will you need a separate table for punch, coffee, etc?
I'm going to put the dispensers for punch up on the bar so people can go up and serve themselves.  I haven't decided if we're going to serve coffee or not.

Thanks for the questions everyone and please keep them coming!